My Little Boys are Ameri-Aussies and I'm Giving Them Tall Poppy Syndrome

Last night while he sat in the bathtub, my raspy-voiced seven year-old asked in his Ameri-Aussie accent, "Mum, have you ev-ah her-d the soong 'The Star-Strangled Banner'?" Omigod, I nearly peed in my pants-- the Star Strangled Banner???

I'm now officially quite sure, Angelina and Brad's kids would definitely put mine to shame in the "knowing-about-the-country-you-came-from" category.  Wow.

I said, "Of course I know that song honey-- it's called the 'Star Spangled Banner'; though, I did think your name for it was very awesome too."  And then, I did what any other really wacky parent would do... I busted out in an unusually loud and dramatic rendition of our national anthem.  And it wasn't pretty--- though it was quite fun.  So fun in fact, that in my tiny bathroom with tiled walls, I must have sang it eight or nine times.  Did I mention it was loud?

Anyway, we ended up googling the lyrics (which there were a few I was unsure of) and singing along to them until bedtime.  Needless to say, I'm sure my husband wanted to kill me-- and I'm guessing our neighbors would have helped.

On a completely different topic, living here in Australia has given me a new perspective on so-called bragging-rights.  I never was shy about telling people how awesome my kids were-- until I finally realized that that's not the way most people do things here.

Instead of the mentality I grew up with, which was along the lines of-- everyone is good at something and if you've got it flaunt it.

So you can take Florida Girl out of America, but you can't take America out of Florida Girl, so that being said... I feel like showing off my little guys once in a while, and I'm going to right now...

My seven year old is an amazing tennis player if I do say so myself.  Here's proof:

And my little guy is a creative sponge and plans on "being famous" when he grows up.  I figured I'd give him a head start here... can't hurt, right?

It's as if the talent in our house is seemingly endless...

So don't be hatin' or cuttin' down these poppies, mate.

Our Australia and New Zealand Cruise Adventure

We got off the plane and collected our luggage at the Sydney Airport International Terminal.   Our discombobulated family of four approached the Australian Customs x-ray area; our two-week long Australia/ New Zealand cruise holiday was really over.

The customs officer asked the usual questions.  "Are you carrying any fruit or nuts?  Any plants or meat products?".  And we confidently responded, "No, no, and no."  Then from behind me, I hear my seven-year old's little raspy voice say, "We're not going to get caught again, are we mom?"

And I could just imagine his outburst leading to the camera crew of Aussie TV show Border Security swooping down on us,  as it was only a few hours earlier (approximately 4:30am) that we had a small fiasco in the Auckland Airport.   Our seven-year old's Thomas the Train rolling carry-on bag was pulled for "additional security screening"-- you know, where they place the suspicious bag in a mysterious machine, that I'm assuming detects explosives and other really bad things.

And when they found the bottle of Little Noses saline spray stuffed in with Jack the Bunny, the thought occurred to me that I probably should have actually monitored what they put in their carry-on bags - which they were both allowed to pack without parental supervision.  This rings especially true after boarding the ship in Sydney, unzipping the luggage and finding that somehow my five year old had crammed his massively fluffy tiger costume in his carry-on, along with a wide array of blankies and stuffed animals.

Needless to say, our cruise on the Diamond Princess was awesome.


Sailing out of Sydney Harbour at sunset.



 
It wouldn't be a cruise without shuffleboard in a tiger suit, now would it?

Our first stop was Melbourne, Australia.  Within ten minutes of meeting our tour guide, we decided we'd be better off without him; what kind of tour guide asks where we want to go-- I've never been here before, how would I know? 

So we went off on our own...





And wondered around aimlessly until we finally met our friends for a lunch date.


For lunch we met up with our fabulous American friends who used to live in Sydney.  And by fabulous, we're talking the kind of mom who cuts her kids' hair all cool and funky, and at the same time with her other hand she makes stuff like this.  For weeks now I've been trying to teach my kids the proper use of "air quotes"-- here my girl Nat is helping the cause.



Hobart, Tasmania was our second stop.  I could totally live there-- loved it!



Though I would probably try and avoid these cute but not so cuddly guys...



Tasmanian Devil with a bad attitude at the Bonorong Wildlife Reserve.

I think this little wallaby friend quickly responded to the mating call sounds my five year-old animal whisperer was making... apparently she or he was looking for some action.




By the way, we took a tour with Great Expeditions-- Michael (above) was our guide for the day, and if ever in Hobart, Tasmania I'd highly recommend you hook up with him, he made Hobart one of the highlights of our trip.

Next we hit Milford Sound Fjordland.  These were taken from our cruise ship balcony.






Me and a fjord in reflection.
 
Dunedin, New Zealand was gorgeous!  Rolling hills sprinkled with sheep and bicyclists and playgrounds.  We had big, big plans for this day, first stop- The Cadbury Chocolate Factory.



Unfortunately, after we got the kids all jacked-up on sugar, it seemed the windy, mountainous roads were a little too much, and an eruption (literally) of carsickness sent us heading back to the ship.  We did however hit another playground before "the incident" and New Zealand playgrounds are so nice they're worth showing off.

Pre-vomit playground: (I'm sparing you the clothing-covered-with-vomit second playground photos... you're welcome:).

 




Christchurch, New Zealand was reminiscent of Victoria, Canada-- gorgeous flower lined streets, friendly people, and all-around nice nice nice.



My kids in front of the Harley building (incidentally our seven year-old's middle name) learning the fine art of making someone laugh to get a photo smile.



More "Dogs Around the World."  Yes my child wears Crocs with socks-- international tourist extraordinaire.

Taraunga/ Rotorua, New Zealand was like the Daytona Beach of New Zealand, party city.  One lesson I learned during this trip was that the islands of New Zealand were formed by an erupted volcano, and this was evident throughout our trip as we visited beached covered in lava rocks and black speckled sand that was hot as hell.



This is the beach that faces the Pacific Ocean, there was a rad party happening on our day there.



This is the inner harbour beach in Tauranga, with our ship, the Diamond Princess, in the background.

During the cruise we had six days at sea.  Back in the day (when my husband and I were in the cruise business) we sailed as on the QE2  from New York to London, and six days at sea meant a whole lot of "afternoon tea", bingo, and cocktails. 



 On Cunard's QE2 in about 1995, we had probably been dating about a year.

 
Sitting on the deck of the QE2 in the good ole days with my dear friend Rochelle.  Rochelle passed away last month from breast cancer, she was one of those people who everyone adored, and she will be missed by her many, many friends.

Now this may sound ridiculous, but my husband and I have each been on over 100 cruises.   And we have had lots of "days at sea"... but cruising with 5 & 7 year old boys puts a whole new dimension to the whole thing.


Pseudo- room service.  That means, Daddy goes to the buffet, loads up plates of food, and comes back to the room hoping we're happy with his chosen assortment... by the way, we always were.


Brotherly love at sea.

And did I mention there was a talent show? Warning: The Cruiseship Talent Show video below, may be absolutely hilarious-- or could potentially lead to a spontaneous narcolepsy attack; I cannot objectively determine which, you may or may not want to actually watch it.  Oh guess what, after TWO HOURS of trying to upload the video-- blogger says there's an error.  Y'all lucked out on that one.

We had New Years Eve on the open sea, an evening which for most passengers involved seeing balloons dropped from the top of the ship's atrium lobby, and lots of cocktails and champagne.

And you know you're on a cruise ship for New Years when:



For us, New Years Eve was incredibly exciting-- days earlier, we had told our seven year-old that if his tooth (which had been loose for a over a year) was out by midnight 12/31/2010 (or if you're in Australia that's 31/12/2010), then the tooth fairy would quadruple the going rate AND he'd get a sip of real champagne at midnight.




Oh yes he did!  Too funny.  We spent last year's holiday season similarly over-toothy and then, toothless.

So that was our big trip, which had been preceded by months of nonstop visitors from the U.S., including my in-laws, my wonderful friend Shelby who owns this company, and my mom.  And now here I sit, no more houseguests and vacation complete.  There are three more weeks left of school vacation here, I've begun my next project--  convincing my husband we should get another puppy this year. 

Ruby the Labradoodle, stayed at her friend Jaffa the Smokin' Hot Labradoodle's house while we were away.  She's been moping around the house for a week now that she's back to her boring life...  I'd say she really needs a friend.  But hey, it's not all bad... we did celebrate her 1st birthday last week, and she does live quite the posh doggy life-- though I am quite sure she'd be ecstatic if she had a new doggy roommate.

So that's pretty much the last few months in a nutshell-- though I do have a secret...

There's a really funny video from our cruise that's been omitted from this post, it's of my husband and I in an elevator after a couple of drinks, cracking up, and swearing at each other... but I have to leave something to your imaginations...  though I am considering adding it to this post... hmmm, should I-- or should I not?

Sydney Night Noodle Market 2010 With My In-Laws!

After an almost thirty-hour long trip from Florida, my in-laws arrived in Sydney looking unaffected and ready to rock like teenagers on Red Bull.   

The first surprise we had lined up for them, was that instead of going to our house we were bringing them to a hotel for a few nights so we could properly disinfect and eradicate the Swine Flu from every surface in that germ factory we call a house.   Luckily Grandma and Grandpa had had the flu vaccine, and by the time they had arrived in Sydney we had recovered the week prior-- but better safe than sorry.  So I guess you could say they got the bonus package, a few days at a nice hotel with Opera House and Bridge views, and a little extra time to mentally prepare for a week of living with two energetic 5 and 6 year old boys.


The view from the hotel room...  I'm still surprised they agreed to check out.
 
Unfortunately, the weather in Sydney has been very temperamental the last few weeks, the second day they were here record wind gusts were raging through the city.  And for some reason we thought this would be a good time to take the in-laws to the famous Icebergs at Bondi Beach for lunch; the good news is, the surfers were out in full-force and it was a real taste of the Aussie spirit and love for surf.
 
This video doesn't exactly do the treacherous winds justice, but trust me they were insane.  What also didn't come through on the video was the cute, old-married-couple-argument my in-laws were having-- hence the cheeky commentary from yours truly.

So, wintery weather and sporadic blistering sun didn't stop us from showing Grandma and Grandpa the best of Sydney.  And the Sydney Night Noodle Market was calling our name.

Note:  No people at the Night Noodle Markets were harmed by the tiger shown in the photos below; though it is a very realistic looking tiger, he is not real...  he is in fact, my five year old child who wears a tiger costume when and wherever possible.



The 2010 Night Noodle Market, tucked away in the middle of Hyde Park.


I wish I had these paper lanterns in my house.


OMG.  Grandpa and mini-Grandpa.


A little entertainment amongst the food stalls.


I sometimes get comments from readers who think they have seen us out around town but aren't sure... so, if you see a little tiger with big blue eyes--- it probably is us!



Maybe next year they'll hire my tiger as the Chinese dragon's sidekick?


Sydney Night Noodle Markets-- I highly recommend going... and eating many dumplings, and noodles, and some Serendipity Ice Cream!!

Paddy's Market and The New Moscow Circus in Sydney

I'm not sure how it's possible that we've been here over three years and yesterday was my first real visit to Paddy's Market, that seems very strange.   And incredibly, my friend, who moved here right around same time we did, hadn't been either-- so yesterday we went, and conquered I might add.

Another tick (that's Aussie for "check") off the old mini-bucket list I keep in my cloudy head.

So here's the big news on Paddy's Market:   it's what we call a "flea market" in the U.S. 







For all you fashionistas, apparently this is where your UGG boots originated from, a booth at Paddy's Market with all things that represent Australia.


I'm still trying to figure out why there were so many wig booths. Club kids?



There were a few food booths.




As I approached this booth a lady asked if they sold chili powder here.  Um... duh (and that was basically the response of the guy working there too).



And the prices were amazing, considering you could pay $5-10 for a tiny punnet of blueberries near my house, and here they were two for $6. I bought a lot of fruit and paid about a quarter of what I normally would.

And this was just hilarious... I've seen it before, and it's still really funny.




But the best thing I bought yesterday at Paddy's Market were two teeny, tiny jade Buddha's (about the size of ping pong balls).  We often read a book called Buddha at Bedtime, and I've been on the lookout for a little Buddha for each of them.  I told them if they rub his belly they get good luck, though now I'm thinking someone may have told me if you rub his belly you'll get pregnant-- oh man, that could be an error of epic proportions.  But with the severe eczema we've been dealing with the our house for the last month and recurring head lice-- yep I said head lice ewwwww, we need some good luck here.



Innocent head scratching?  You be the judge.

But itchy heads, and itchy eczema legs, and all-- we still were able to take in The Great Moscow Circus a couple days ago, which conveniently pitched a tent in our area recently, so how could we not?

I'm still quite baffled over the bizarre, dark opening scene in which some Russians (I'm assuming) walked around looking sad, dressed in winter clothes.  If you ask me, which you didn't, not really the way to start off a circus.  But the performers were awesome, acrobatics, contortionists, a juggler-- very Cirque d' Soleil and really great, the only exception (which I wasn't expecting or probably wouldn't have bought tickets) was the miniature ponies they brought out and make do "tricks" in the ring.  The guy giving them direction looked scary and was holding some long whip looking thing-- at that point I almost left, but I didn't move fast enough and the ponies were done.



The Great Moscow Circus grand entrance.

After the show, we played a couple of those creepy looking games they must have stolen from Luna Park.








We told them they could get snow cones or fairy floss (which is Australian for "cotton candy").  I recommended they choose fairy floss since they'd never had it before (and I wanted some), but they incorrectly chose snow cones.  Of course they realized pretty quickly they had made a mistake, so we caved in and they ended up with both (yay for me:).




The bonus cotton candy/ fairy floss, I'm off to the side eating some and thinking of days gone by.

Winter Festival at Bondi Beach & Good Food and Wine Show

As we pulled up to our house I spotted an industrial, classroom-style whiteboard across the street on the curb; it was a double-sided monstrosity on wheels, complete with a bag full of markers and accessories hanging from its side.  We rang the neighbors' doorbell, and they happily told us to take it-- which we did.  Wooo-hooo-- SCORE!   It was perfect timing,  my boys then spent most of their three and a half week school break playing school with the whiteboard.  BEST. GIFT. EVER!  I would have gladly paid the whiteboard $20/hour (going babysitting rate in Sydney) for all the entertainment it's provided, it was THAT good!  

And we did actually leave the house a few times during winter school break because there were some great things on in July around Sydney and we needed some action.

This past weekend the Winter Festival at Bondi Beach, called Bondi Bergstation began.  They've built an ice skating rink on at the beach along with an entire mini-village including a Max Brenners (famous for their hot chocolates), snacks, skate rentals, and snow, it was actually suds, but I won't tell those poor kids who've never seen snow before and now think it's foamy and smells like soap:. 

People who've never skated (I'm just assuming this by watching them) and people who clearly aspire for skating greatness, joined each other on the ice for 45 minutes sessions in which it was wall-to-wall skaters -- and lots of wiping out on the ice.

Here are some moments captured from this past weekend at the Bondi Beach Winter Festival:



The sea o' skaters.



The "snow". 



The snacks.  $6 for a stick with some spiraled potato cut into thin chips-- I think we went through six of these, probably the single most expensive one potato ever sold.




The rink at the beginning of a new skate session, before it got completely packed.  Note the aspiring skater in the pink tutu.




Hmmm, the Bondi Beach paramedic mobile?  How do they carry the stretcher on that?



Back view of the village perched up on the grassy area at Bondi Beach.

We also went to The Good Food & Wine Show at the Sydney Convention Center.  Normally we would have gotten a babysitter and left the kids at home for something like this, but the four of us are obsessed with a little television show called Masterchef Australia, it's similar to Top Chef in the U.S. (but better), and two of the Masterchef judges (Gary and George) were doing a gig at the Good Food & Wine Show. 

Unfortunately we had seats on the floor and couldn't see much.   There was a ginormous television screen above the stage so at least we had that view, but whatever, I could have stayed home for that-- especially considering that what they made was virtually identical to what they made on the TV show the same evening.    Though we couldn't see the cooking demonstration, we did however have an amazing view of a guy two rows in front of us who was plastered drunk.  He kept turning around like he was going to start acting even more belligerent, but luckily his drunk girlfriend kept him entertained by making out with him.  Family fun at its best.

So all in all, being that we were with our 5 & 6 year old boys and weren't planning on drinking an excessive amount of wine samples, the Good Food and Wine Show was a disappointment.  There were really no places to actually eat any actual Good Food, except for one small restaurant type area featuring five chefs (two of them were the Masterchef judges).  In all there were five dishes you could buy, and five starters-- it was pretty pathetic for a freaking food show.

Well I've just caught myself in a lie, there was one more place to eat, and it was packed (as there were no other options)-- the Sydney Convention Center cafe, hahaha!  It was basically hospital food-- and it was where everyone was eating!  Sorry, but that's sad- really, really sad.

So the Good Food & Wine show was a disappointment for us, and I don't think I've ever said that about any festival or event we've ever gone to in Sydney.  Maybe next time we get the babysitter and go there only for the wine tastings, I am absolutely certain that getting sloshed would have improved my experience.

Here are some of the things we saw at the Good Food and Wine Show 2010:




Welcome.




Photo from our floor seats taken with the camera hoisted in the air, our actual view wasn't this good.



Clearly I needed some of this.








Looks like my six year old thought the show would be better after a stiff drink.  We love limoncello!




The best part for us was the rides we went on in Darling Harbour after the show :).