Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Moons Over my Hammy

In college I had food poisoning from sliced deli style turkey, since then I've become the pickiest deli meat eater ever. I'm a die-hard Boars Head girl, anything else scares me.

It appears that sliced turkey is no where near as popular in Australia, as it is in the U.S., and when you do find slice turkey here it's basically always smoked and highly processed, both of which make me want to hurl.

That all being said, I've recently become more open-minded to the wide world of ham, and there is no shortage of ham down under.

Norton St. Grocer, the local gourmet food store in our hood, has this amazing Mango Honey Glazed Ham. Not only does this ham look beautiful with a sparkling criss-cross pattern of charred sugar on the outside, but it tastes like a little slice of hammy heaven.

Last week when I arrived at Norton St. to reload, the beautiful ham I expected to find in all of it's largeness, was only a small end piece which no doubt would yield pitiful ham scraps instead of the enormous circular slices I had my hammy-heart set on.

The conversation with the girl at the deli counter went like this:

Me: Wow, it's so small. Can you possibly bust out a new ham?

Ham Keeper: We'll have to finish this one before we can start a new one.

Me: Can you slice a piece so I can see what it looks like? (angling for a free ham taste, yo).

Ham Keeper: Sure.

She comes back a few minutes later with a slice of ham the size of my thumb...

Me: Do you really consider those "slices" of ham??

Ham Keeper: Um, yeah. Well, how much did you want?

Me: Oh, I need a lot!!! Probably about a kilo. (Um, did I really just say "a kilo"-- that's 2.2 lbs., oh man).

Ham Keeper's co-worker: Just get a new one and slice it up.

What's a girl to do? Buy ham scraps, or buy enough ham to feed like all the Jolie-Pitt children for two weeks?

Ham and cheese sandwiches. Tomato, boccocini, and ham stacks topped with drizzled balsamic vinegar. Green eggs and ham. Pasta salad with ham, peas and ranch dressing. Moons over my Hammy. Ham on crackers. Ham roll ups. Ham. Ham. Ham. Did I mention we've been eating a lot of ham?

I think I've said the word "ham" so many times it looks like it's spelled wrong now. I hate when that happens.



Rassles said...

I have never been a ham fan, but hot damn if I didn't almost lick the computer screen at that picture.

Felicia said...

I'm not a big fan of ham either. I'm also a Boar's Head turkey girl. My son lives for his turkey sandwiches. That's a bummer they don't have much of a selection of it. I admit you made ham sound pretty damn good though! lol

formerly fun said...

Ham Keeper's Coworker, you angling for free taste 'o hammy-- that is gold my friend

Marvin the Martian said...

As Monty Python is wont to sing, "ham ham ham ham, wonderful ham!"

Boar's Head is okay. But then, I like turkey pastrami, which is an odd enough kind of meat that you can't really tell between brands. The only brand I really hate is Jennie-O, because i'm reasonably certain it's made of meat byproducts mixed with styrofoam.

hereinfranklin said...

I've got the Boar's Head turkey in the fridge right now...but I must say that the ham looks much tastier. Don't forget quiche...and it's getting cold down there...split pea soup perhaps? Or you could go all Iron Chef and make some ham ice cream--salty sweet creamy goodness.

MB said...

Moons Over My Hammy....where do you come up with this? Hilarious.

bugmum said...

You lucky, lucky girl being near Norton St...I'd give my left arm for the vast array of yumminess in that vicinity. Sigh...a little slice of Italy...

V said...


But in bulk and freeze it! Somewhere in the recesses of my memory I remember doing this in the States. Don't think you can do it with all deli meat, but ham is one of them. There's so much salt in it and it's so firm, it should defrost like a charm. Maybe test a few slices and see.

And dude WTF with the turkey, right? I've resorted to sliced chicken breast due to the severe lack of turkey. Another Aussie oddity.

Florida Girl In Sydney said...

Rassles- I was never into ham either- but the one I get looks just like the one in the photo-- so you see how it would be impossible NOT to eat it.

Felicia- Boar's Head turkey... I miss you.

FF- Thanks, I try hard.

Marvin- What is there better than Boars Head? Homemade?

Hereinfranklin- Ham ice cream? Is that what you're sayin'? Split pea soup-- how could I have forgotten that???

MB- You can thank Denny's for the title. It's the best thing on their menu! Google it.

Bugmum- Yeah, it only took me like a year to find Norton St. Grocer... but I finally got there!

v- But don't you find the sliced chicken here to be smoked and highly processed just like the turkey? Yes, I should have frozen some-- what was I thinking?

Jenny said...

I miss Boars Head. And I'm getting tired of peanut butter sandwiches. May have to get adventurous and try some ham . . .

A Free Man said...

So, now you have a kilo of ham? Hoping that you're in a hammy mood.

steck said...

This is, of course, the special kosher ham available exclusively in Leichhardt.

Take care that you don't come down with the swine flu now!

MB said...

Do you ever buy those whole little stuffed chooks? That's what we used to get. Yum. I'm not a big ham person. I do eat turkey and funny, don't think I ever ate any ever in Australia. So funny.

And you know I've never once been to a Denny's. :) I have, however, been to waffle house.

Gypsy said...

I'm disappointed there was no "swine" in that whole post.

Dirty Pirate Hooker said...

This post made me gag over and over again. I have a strong aversion to ham. Its sweaty.

Laura Lee said...

Hi Florida Girl!
I tagged you in an international mommy blog meme.
Here is the link to my blog post where I tagged you.

It's an experiment to see if we can get around the world of mommy blogs in 80 clicks. Looking forward to reading more of your blog!

opinioneater said...

Love this title.
I go to Denny's just so I can say "Moons over My Hammy".
It's even funnier at 2 a.m. when you're slightly inebriated.
BTW, I agree with you on the Aussie ham obsession (and shun of the turkey). Can you imagine trying to keep kosher there?

Florida Girl In Sydney said...

Jenny- Did you notice people here uses butter on sandwiches? Like ham and cheese with butter.

Freeman- I'm trying to think of a catchy little diddy to use the word "ham" in-- but I'm at a loss.

Steck- Oh yeah, kosher ham made from tofu?

MB- Okay, I'll take a wild guess and say a "chook" is a chicken??
Yes, I totally buy those! Charcoal Charlie's is the best!

Gypsy- Yes, even though my topic was porky, I was trying to avoid incorporating the whole swine flu into it-- ya know, being that the ham is so damn delicious-- I didn't want to ruin the happy thoughts. Haha.

DPH- Ham is sweaty? And you don't like it?

Laura Lee- Thanks, I'll take a look at your post! Cheers!

Opinioneater- Totally and totally. I have always loved the name Moons Over My Hammy-- and especially in a drunken Denny's run back in the day. And there is something about Australia and ham-- I think we should get to the bottom of it.

Florida Girl In Sydney said...

MB- Oh, I just noticed you said you went to Waffle House-- the first time I went there I was about 25 years old and it's all about getting hash browns scattered, smothered, covered and all that. You may not even know what I'm talking about?

Marci said...

LOL! Your blog is fabulous! Australia? So cool~would love to experience living there temporarily.

Kate said...

I agree about the Macca's iced coffee. GROSS! Do they have decent iced coffee anywhere here? Are you a Dunkin Donuts drinker by any chance?

Florida Girl In Sydney said...

Marci- Thanks-- yeah, it's cool-- and weird-- and cool-- all at the same time.

Kate- I am ALL ABOUT Dunkin D's coffee!!!!! Ugh, you just made want some-- oh noooooo.

Angel said...

I buy a lot of deli meats. You've scared me now. Great. Food poisioning scares me.

Corrina said...

I want to go to your house and eat ham sandwiches for a week!! The Jolie-Pitt children will understand.

Miss Fi said...

Moons over my Hammy - very clever. I like a good pun

Ham cheese and tomato toasted sandwiches are one of my favourite things.

My Mum used to make us ham steaks and pineapple. I haven't had it in ages. The steaks need to be about 10 - 15 cm thick (you should be able to buy them at the supermarket as well as delis).

Just whack them under the grill with a slice of tinned pineapple and grill until hot. Serve with mashed potatoes. Very easy and something your boys might like.

Sliced turkey is much nicer and more readily available in the States than here.

I've yet to have a yummo turkey sandwich like the one my friend in North Carolina used to make.

Blues said...

Floridagirl - I buy entire hamlegs and put them on wooden ham-holder things (people are crazy about hams here and they have special ham holders) and we slowly eat the ham over the course of a month or two (supposedly they don't go bad cause they are salted and smoked and what not). I love ham. I'm a total hammie.

There is one sick detail though. The ham leg is literally a leg and it still has the hoof and all and as I type it is on my countertop and I can see a ham hoof every time I go into my kitchen. It never ceases to freak me the hell out.

jpck said...

Giirrrlll....I'll think of you while ordering my next B-Head sub at Publix!!!

Currently Untitled said...

i love ham, i really want some now! lol
i have an award for you over on my blog, come over and check it out.

Florida Girl In Sydney said...

Angel- I often put fear into people-- regarding cold cuts.

Corrina- I would be totally absolutely thrilled if you would come here-- do it, do it, do it, do it.

Miss Fi- I think it's pretty clever too-- and I wish it was an original-- but it's actually the name of an item on the menu at a restaurant chain called Denny's... you may have already known that,
I'm not sure.

Blues- Oh, ham is so totally Spain, it's not even funny. At the casino near us there's a tapas restaurant and they have an entire "ham only" menu-- it's just a range of ham, aged and smoked and all Spanish varieties. I want more info on the ham holder thing, sounds crazy... you know, in a good way.

jpck- You had to say the word "Publix" didn't you. Oh man. I heart Publix.

Untitled- An award, yippie-- I'm hauling ass over there right now.

The Lucky Mrs. T said...

I love ham. Way better than turkey any day.

Course, living on an Angus Cattle farm - I personally feel that nothing beats a bloody steak! :)

I tagged you in my blog today.
Come on over and check it out!

Florida Girl In Sydney said...

Mrs. T- I totally take a steak over them both too. Yum.

I'll be posting the tag thing on my blog in the next couple of days-- thanks so much and I'm totally working on it1

buffalodick said...

Denny's has a sandwich by the title of your post! It's pretty good too!

Dr Zibbs said...

But that ham looks REALLY good.